“Technology makes it possible for people to gain control over everything, except over technology.”
I went to the Apple store with Tunabreath yesterday. She had just bought a new cell phone, an iPhone, at the AT&T store a few days ago. She started to have problems with it shortly after she purchased it. When she called me, I’d hear her voice for about 5 seconds, and then I’d hear this loud MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP sound. It was not unlike the sound used by the Emergency Broadcasting System, and when I heard it the first time, it had me thinking for just a moment, "OMG, Tunabreath is under attack by aliens!"
So, she brought her iPhone back to the AT&T store, and they promptly told her she had to bring it to the Apple store. So, she trekked over the Apple store from the AT&T store. Apple gave her a new phone, and off she went.
Once again, problems occurred, and she called Apple and began to get a little steamed on the phone. This was her second phone in a matter of a few days, and unlike me, who used my phone to send pictures of myself, my cats, and my dog to friends, check my email desperately hoping for “We went to interview you” messages, and annoy people with text messages, she needed her phone for her livelihood.
Once again, she had to go back to the Apple store. Oh, and this is where I come in. I went to the mall with her to do this errand, but not before we greatly pimped out my black blazer, which will be part of my great Madonna Halloween ensemble. Note: Nothing says 80s pop star like gold glitter!
At 2:10pm, the Apple “genius” was ready to troubleshoot her issue. He was a young kid named “Eric,” or was it “Ethan,” or perhaps it was “Einstein?” After all, the kid was supposed to be a genius. We sat down at the genius bar; I wanted to order a martini, but they only thing they were serving here was “extensive knowledge of Apple products” and guaranteeing that they could “answer all your technical questions.” How boring. Where’s my Mojito?!
Tunabreath began to explain her issue to her genius. Every time she mentioned an issue, I’d say, “It’s you!” After I said, “It’s you!” for the third time, the genius said, “I like you.” Err, he must have liked that fact that I, unlike everyone else who probably came in the store, knew full well that it’s never the technology, oh, no; it’s always the user’s fault! Of course, I knew it was most likely the phone; however, I think it was refreshing for the genius to have someone come in "pretending" it wasn’t the phone, and someone like Tunabreath, who was not threatening to fling the phone down on the floor while shouting obscenities.
The genius listened to all the details, and then took some little card out of Tunabreath’s phone, took the little card out of his phone, and then put his little card into Tunabreath’s phone. I felt like asking, “Hey, can’t her phone get some kind of disease from your phone like that?” But, I kept my mouth shut, because at that point, I knew I was there only to provide moral phone support and thought to myself instead, “Come on little iPhone, you think you can, you think you can, you think you can make phone calls for Tunabreath.”
The genius made a phone call from the store’s landline to Tunabreath’s phone. At this point, I became captivated by all the people who appeared to be “hanging out” in the store and the Apple store employees. There was definitely a pattern to the clientele and staff. It was fleur-de-lis with a touch of paisley and a hint houndstooth. Yes, I love fleur-de-lis, paisley, and houndstooth, and the iPhone was looking really cool after my first up-close-and-personal vicarious experience with it via Tunabreath.
So, after either hearing the MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP sound or not (again, I was in full-on people mode watching by then), the genius deemed that Tunabreath needed a new and THIRD phone. He got her phone up and running, and then he tested a call. All okay. We left very happy, until about 50 yards out of the store, Tunabreath’s voice mail requested a password. Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat? So, back to the store she went, and she waved me on to Teavana, the tea store.
After a side trip to purchase peppermint patties to erase the garlic after-taste from lunch, I went to Teavana. Twenty minutes later, there was still no Tunabreath to be found. So, I walked back down to the Apple store. There she was with a non-genius-regular-Apple-person who seemed to be solving her password problem for her. In about two minutes, he said she was all set, and off we went.
When at the Apple store, Tunabreath said something like, “To think there was a day when we did it all without cell phones.” Technology means "more" today in so many ways, especially when you’ve got an iPhone (that works!) and those cool apps to boot. But, certainly there are still times when less technology can be more; and is there an app for that?!?! ♥
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