Okay, that last one may need a slightly different category. I think that learning how to drive would be better put into a parent's kids coming-of-age potential nightmares. Also, in that category are puberty and dating. There are probably many more things to add to that category, BUT I think I've included two of the biggies!
Last Sunday, I not only began teaching my son, Nathan, how to drive, I also brought along my friend Ellen's son, Connor.
I didn't originally offer to teach Connor how to drive.
Ellen and I were discussing the whole learning-how-to-drive saga, and I said that as soon as Nathan got his permit, I'd be taking him out to drive.
Ellen then asked excitedly "And, Connor too?"
And I said, "Um, sure."
Ellen said, "I'm just a bit nervous about taking him out."
Of course, Ellen has four boys, and Connor is the third learning how to drive.
I sorta just figured that she's totally burnt out on that "learning how to drive" parental duty.
I also thought that since Nathan did not have his permit yet, it might motivate him to be driving with Connor since they've been life-long buddies.
So, last Saturday, I called Ellen and told her that it was time to hit the road on Sunday.
The first stop in Jean's School of Driving and Music Appreciation (okay, there was going to be NO music whilst driving, but there would be by the time they got more advanced, and I would be choosing all the CDs to play!) was the parking lot of the local high school.
Nathan and I drove down to pick Connor up on Sunday afternoon.
Once Connor climbed into the driver's seat of "Ye Olde Faithful Learn How to Drive in the Toyota Rav", I felt that I had to say something profound as a parent.
For example, when Connor and Nathan were 30 and looked back on this moment, I wanted one of them to say, "And then your/my Mom said [insert_MOST_excellent_parental_profound_statement here]."
Usually, I'm not good with on-the-fly with profound, so I thought back to when I was learning how to drive.
Thus, I said, "Now, look. You're driving a 7K machine that can kill someone!'
They both looked at me, looked at each other, and then laughed.
Are profound parental statements usually fodder for laughter?
Hmmm, I think not.
And then Nathan said to Connor, "Remember, Connor, my Mom is crazy."
Um, so yeah, the first thing my Mom ever said to me when I got in the driver's seat of her '77 turd brown Dodge Aspen was, "Now, look. You're driving a 2K machine that can kill someone!"
Note to self: Next time, Google for an appropriate profound parental statement.
Meet the drivers!
Connor: We will always follow the rule book!
Nathan: Are we done yet, cuz I want to go home and play X-box!
Connor did a few loops around the parking lot, and I even let Nathan drive (Gasp! Illegally! Shhhh!) around the parking lot a few times.
Funny, but you can not map personality types to driving skills in this case.
Connor, who is much more out going than Nathan, had a "mouse" foot on the gas pedal, and Nathan, who is much more of an introvert, had an "elephant" foot on the gas pedal. Needless to say, if we had to make it to Phoenix in a week, Nathan would be driving, cuz Connor would have us only to the Berkshires by then.
I know a lot of people fret when they begin to drive with their kids, but I found it more entertaining than going to the movies or most things like that!
I loved each boy's interpretation of a "full stop".
Nathan stomped on the brake and had both Connor and I yelling "Whiplash!", whereas Connor's stop had both Nathan and I going, "Um, was that a stop or a yield, Dude?"
Anyway, as I said in a previous post, I thought Nathan was pretty relaxed about the whole driving thing when I found the study guide on the family room floor.
That is, I was wondering if he'd have a license by the time he was 20.
He then called me last night out of the blue and said, "Mom, I've been studying. Can you take me to get my permit after school tomorrow?"
After I had a kitten due to the shock, I said, "Sure."
In preparation, I called Ellen this morning and told her that I'd pick both Nathan and Connor up at school today, go to the registry, and then take them both driving afterwards.
Unfortunately, and I should have probably thought of this, too, knowing Nathan as I do, he forgot that he needed a bazillion forms of ID in order to take the permit test, so we couldn't go to get his permit today.
Pending parents producing a birth certificate and a Social Security card, we're now going on Monday!
The day wasn't a total loss though.
Nathan needed to come back to my house and get a few things.
After picking up what he needed, Connor proceeded to drive Nathan to his Dad's; however, Nathan requested a stop at Dunkin'Donuts before that.
I said, "Connor, do you think you're ready for the drive-thru?"
He said, "Yeah, I think I can handle it."
And, he was, and he did quite well!
That's my boy...well, that's my neighbor's boy...same difference!
After stopping and ordering, we drove up to the window.
It appeared that we would have to wait a bit, because they forgot my iced tea.
Connor said, "Can I put the car in "Park" instead of keeping my foot on the brake?"
I said, "Yep, go ahead."
He said, "Aw, that's sweet!"
One thing you have to love about teaching someone something new is their amazement in the simplest something that you've known for like forever.
Then Connor said to Nathan, "Dude, did you see the confidence in the turn I made into this place?"
Nathan said, "Yeah."
Connor said, "It was pretty sweet, wasn't it?"
I'm sorry, but it was all I could do to keep from giggling.
Anyway, after dropping Nathan off, Connor drove me to the market, accompanied me while getting groceries, and then drove all the way home.
Gawd, I'm SO not a movie star, a rock star, or a CEO, but I've gotta chauffer!!!
And, it's grand!
Tangent story: Last Fall, I picked Nathan up after work one night. Before picking him up, I had worked an 8-hour day, retrieved his sister from the after-school program, shopped for dinner, and when Nathan climbed into the car, I said, "Gawd, I can't wait 'til you can drive!"
Nathan gave me a puzzled look.
I said, "Well, on these nights that I'm a single parent, you could drive yourself to hockey, fetch your sister, go grocery shopping for me, and lots of other stuff like that."
Nathan said to me totally dead pan, "So, basically, I'm going to be your man bitch?"
After laughing hysterically for about 2 minutes I said, "No, I like to think of it as a personal assistant!"
Anyway, back to our driving antics...
Upon on arrival at Ellen's tonight, I told her that Connor just needed to work on coming to a COMPLETE stop and anticipating the traffic in front of him. But, otherwise, he'd done a great job.
Then she proceeded to tell Connor that he would have to watch Noah while she picked up Chris, and
then I said, "Wait a minute. Connor's gonna go pick up Chris!"
Then Ellen said, "Well, can Chris drive home then?"
I tell ya, I should open a "Jean's Auto School"!
Connor drove to pick up Chris, and then Chris drove us home.
(BTW: I'm now signed up to take both Chris and Connor for their license tests!)
Upon arrival at Ellen's for the second time, Ellen told me what a good teacher I was, and she said, "I couldn't do it. Well, you and are are just two different people."
And, indeed we are.
I got the "calm teacher" gene, and Ellen didn't.
But, that's okay, cuz we're all built so very differently.
Not having a job is a bit of a bummer, but I can think of worse places that I could be in right now.
I have to say that teaching Nathan and Connor how to drive has been so much fun.
It's been SO very good to be there for them both, especially for something so important.
And when I left Ellen's tonight, "Crud, I don't have a job" was the furthest thing from my mind; instead I smiled and thought "Wow, I feel great. I really made a difference in several lives today."
And, I tell you, that IS the best feeling in the world.
