Don't we all know it, especially in the last six months?
I put on my underwear inside out some mornings, I frequently forget my son's orthodontist appointments, and I wonder where I put my reading glasses sometimes, and then after 2 minutes, I realize they're right on the top of my head!
Anyway, I was making the bed this morning.
And, just after I put on the fitted sheet, Liam (my 14-pound Maine Coon Cat) jumped up on top of the bed.
He always does this. I used to think that he thought I needed his "help"; if ONLY he could help me make the beds!
His lame excuse always seems to be "But, I have no thumbs!"
Anyway, now I just think it's one of those games that cats like to play with you to mess with your mind.
Kinda like a National Geographic special: The Age-Old Struggle Between Cat and Man – Does Either Win in the End?
Dat-dat-duna-duna-duna!
Queue theme from National Geographic!
http://www.imeem.com/people/B2yhLu/music/NrKFVT4a/various_artists_national_geographic_theme/
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Tangent story:
I found Liam on the Internet.
Yep, the cat, Caesar, who I trapped in a hav-a-heart trap on my porch with sardines for bait had died.
He was only three; he had a stroke.
Caesar was feral when I got him, and over time, with much love and understanding…from him to me…from me to him, he became a wonderful tame cat.
After he died, my son, Nathan and I were devastated , so I went to www.petfinder.com.
There I found Liam.
He was allegedly being held at the Wild Irish Rose Animal Rescue in some town in CT that was over two hours away from us.
I emailed the rescue, and I heard back within a day from Sheila.
She told me that I had to fill out an application, pay $175, and then I had to give her three references which SHE WOULD CALL.
References?
For a cat?
I thought, "Jeez, applying to college wasn't this difficult."
I remember my sister, Julie, calling me after she received her call from Sheila.
"Hi, Jean, err, I just got off of the phone with that woman from the cat rescue.
I thanked her for speaking to her, and I asked her how it went.
"I spent 40 minutes on the phone with her. It was like a job interview!!!!"
Err, um, I was beginning to wonder about all this.
Anyway, I emailed Sheila back, and I asked when I might come down to get Liam.
She emailed me back saying he was coming up on the next "transport".
Yeah, WTF?!
A transport?
Was Liam a soldier coming back from the Cat-Dog conflict in Guam?!
Apparently, a shelter in West Virginia had to close; they were tearing down the old shelter and putting up a new one. So, they needed to find homes for all the animals or it was curtains for the current animal inhabitants.
Sheila volunteered to find homes for a few cats while they were fostered in West Virginia. And then some wonderful soul drove the animals up to their destinations every few weeks, yep, all the way from West Virginia.
God, do I even know where West Virginia is? Isn't West Virginia like North Dakota, too? They're those states you don't hear about much, so when something happens in them in the news, you have to kind of scratch your head and think, "Where IS North Dakota again?" :-)
I finally got an email saying Liam was coming up, and I arranged to go down and pick him up one night.
Nathan went with me. Upon arrival, the Wild Irish Rose Animal Rescue turned out to be Sheila's house. Upon entering, the scent and the burning Yankee candle, led me to believe that the cats were close by.
I looked up and there in her kitchen were about 6 cages, each holding two to three cats.
I was a tad grossed out by it, but it was hard to cast aspersions on someone who went through so much to save the lives of these animals. Anyway, I paid her my $175, we put Liam in the cat carrier, and we headed back home. On the way home, Nathan took Liam out, put him on his lap, and Liam purred non-stop. Talking about being rescued…Liam was, but I think at that moment Liam rescued us right back.
After getting him to the vet's later in the week, I found out that he had a million different parasites, an eye infection, and so .. after spending $800, he started to gain weight, and he turned into the beautiful cat he is today.
The unique thing about him is that he chirps more than he meows.
If he's sitting with his back to me, and I sneak up on him, and touch his sides, he says, "Brrrrrrruuuuuppp!" It's the funniest thing.
In summary, you can indeed always find some VERY good things on the internet.
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So, have you ever tried to make a bed around a 14-pound cat?
It's quite difficult. Try it for fun sometime.
It's a game the whole family can play!
Anyway, I think Liam thinks I'm going to stop what I'm doing, pat him, and then grab a few cat treats from the container that is kept in my underwear drawer of all places.
But, when I unfold the flat sheet, and raise it up in the air to put it on the bed, I see him look at me and say, of course, only if cat's could talk, "Oh, she means business."
The flat sheet goes up into the air and lands on the bed.
Now Liam turns into "lump under flat sheet on bed".
And I hear some meowing, like as in "Meow [WTF! There's a sheet on me!]", meow [Who turned out…], meow [the freaking lights?]!"
Sometimes I have to repeat the flat sheet maneuver to get it just right on the mattress.
When the sheet goes up again, Liam looks entirely perturbed, and I say out loud to him, "Look, get off the bed if you've got a problem with this."
That's when, if cats could flip you the bird, well, he'd lift his paw up and give me "the finger" or, in this case, maybe "the claw".
Once he is covered with the sheet (well, when the sheet is on the bed in the way in which I think it should be), I see the furry lump make its way up to the top of the bed. The lump stops, sticks its head out from under the sheet, looks as if he's checking to see if the coast is clear (i.e., a pillow isn't being thrown his way), and wriggles out from underneath the top sheet.
Then he defiantly repositions himself in the middle of the bed on top of the top sheet. I see this calculated cat course of action, sigh, and I reach for the blanket, so he knows I'm serious.
Once he sees the blanket in my hand, he says, "I dare you!"
I take the blanket by the corners, throw it up in the air over the mattress, and it plummets down on top of Liam's head.
"Meow!" I hear.
I say, "Serves you right, you furry bastard!"
Again, he makes his way, though a bit slower now, cuz he's got two layers on him now, to the top of the bed, wriggles out, and AGAIN repositions himself in the center of the bed.
He now glares at me and says, "Is THAT all you've got, Sister?!"
I turn to pick up the comforter.
I see him flinch just a bit, and he says, "Bring it on!!!!!"
I take the comforter by the ends and toss it up into the air. Because it's much heavier than the blanket, it doesn't waft down on top of the bed the way the sheet or the blanket did. It just "thuds" right down on top of his head.
-thonk-
"Meow!" I hear again.
Again, he makes his way slowly, much slower now cuz he's got three layers on him, to the top of the bed.
It takes quite a bit of effort now to wriggle out from underneath the covers.
He returns to the center of the bed and says, "You don't scare me."
At this point, we both look at each other, sigh, and I say, "It's a draw........again."
He agrees, and I can tell he does, because then he lies down on bed and starts to wash himself.
This sounds really odd to admit, but I love watching him wash himself.
I can be frazzled, upset, exhausted, or grumpy, and when I pause to watch him wash himself, it's like taking a gigantic chill pill in cat form for me.
My favorite part is when he washes his paws.
I love the way he licks his paw, pulls at the huge tufts of fur between his toes, and then meticulously washes every square inch of his mitt, but not before taking the paw up to his face several times, using it as if it were the softest paint brush to slowly and deliberately cover his cheeks with gigantic circles. It looks so comforting.
My second favorite is they way he washes his back paws. Again, after washing the paw all over and pulling the tufts of fur, he moves up to his ankle. He licks it, but then he starts to suck it. It's almost as if the purpose of this action is two-fold – cleaning and comfort. He looks so happy and relaxed when he's sucking on his ankle.
And, do you know what?
It makes me happy and relaxed watching him do all of this.
It just struck me as funny.
I lead a busy life, and I often feel like "I need a massage! I need a holiday! I need the world to stop for a day so I can catch up!"
But, if I take five minutes to watch Liam wash his feet, it makes me incredibly calm and almost peaceful.
It is just interesting to think that sometimes it is indeed the smallest things in life that can make you feel the best.
