The Next Chapter

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I think that most everyone expects their life to go in a certain direction or has some idea of the direction that it will go in. And for most, a job usually helps to lead them in that direction. It’s a whole different situation when you lose your job, especially if that job has largely defined who you are and has been something you have loved doing for a large portion of your life. When you lose your job, it’s very easy to lose your direction professionally, financially and, most importantly, emotionally.

Yes, you are still a Mom/Dad, a brother/sister, a friend or maybe you’re just a plain old pain in the ass. :-) But, without your job, you’re not a “engineer,” “technical writer,” or an “inside sales account executive.” Well, you are, because that’s what you do, and that’s what you have to write on your tax returns as your occupation. But, without a job, it’s easy to feel that you’ve lost your definition; thus, when you look up yourself in the mental Dictionary of Life, this is the picture that appears next to your name.



My apologies to those of you who have this as your blog picture; but come on, go wild and use a picture, even if it’s not of you, because life is that much better when it’s not in black, white, and gray tones and reminiscent of a mug shot! The first follower, who is local and uses a real picture, instead of this one, gets a batch of homemade cookies of his/her choosing! :-)

Yesterday, I got email from my friend, Marcia. She is one of the “Lovelies” which comprise Anne, Cathy, Laura, Melissa (a.k.a. Tunabreath), and moi. In a nutshell, she was disappointed in her job search; it was a mini-rant, and believe me, I am good at those, too! I read it, and I knew exactly how she felt. She and I had both gotten laid off in February.

It was a busy day, and I thought I’d call her at the “right” time (i.e., no distractions and could give her my undivided attention); however, it never seemed to be the “right” time, given that I was running around all afternoon and then doing my early evening routine, which consisted of transporting children, making school lunches, feeding children, bathing children, feeding pets, and cleaning cat boxes.

I then got a second email from her asking me if she offended me. And, that point, I knew that there would probably never be a “right” time to call, and I didn’t want her to think that I was offended in the least, so I called her. I apologized for not contacting her sooner in the day, and we ended up on the phone for quite some time until I had to leave to fetch Nathan from his away soccer game at the high school.

Again, like with Melissa, Marcia and I had not talked to each other in years (over 16), but as she told me about her frustrations with her job search and about her life, it was like we had never stopped being friends either. At the end of the conversation, we decided that we would try and get together today.

At 8:30 this morning, Bill texted me about a ride. By the time I got off the phone with the lovely Tunabreath, who had called me after a text message this morning, it was 9:30. I wanted to ride, but then I thought, “I need to go see Marcia today more than I need to bike.” So, I texted Bill back and said that I wouldn’t be riding today.

I called Marcia, and I had to laugh because she said something like, “Well, I’m in my pajamas, and I’m not cleaning my house, okay?” and I said, “Well, that’s just fine, because I’m not showering; I’m just throwing on my Hello Kitty hat and medicating with some deodorant and perfume, okay?” I swear, if I had shown up in a robe and fuzzy pink slippers, Marcia wouldn’t have batted an eyelash nor would have I if she opened the front door wearing the same ensemble. In about 20 minutes, I was on my way to her house for tea.

When I arrived, Marcia ran out to greet me, and we embraced. We chatted forever at her house, went for lunch, and I finally had to leave to pick up Iz. We talked about many things, but I think one of the things that we both agreed on was that when unemployed, you always had to get yourself out of the house and moving.

I feel that in the last two days, my life has changed significantly in that I am writing a new chapter in my life. As I said before, the job will come when it comes, and I don’t believe that will be for a while yet; however, in the mean time, if I can’t make a job happen, then I am going to make my life happen. And, my life has happened so much, especially in the last two months.

While I worry about not having a job and all that goes with it, I have seen, especially lately, that my life is still going in a direction, a direction I never thought it could – one where I spend more times with my kids, write for “fun”, see friends often, and bike whenever I want. In a way, unemployment, though a dark chapter, is writing a wonderful chapter in a new book for me, and every day I don't work, I write that book. And while my life remains on hold, it still has direction and purpose.

It was wonderful to be with you today, Marcia. <3

Things to Do with Your Cat When Halloween is Right Around the Corner: Test drive costumes! I think Liam is a very Happy Rooster, don’t you?