When Are You Going to Get a Job?

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We all sat down around my neighbor's table on their outdoor deck at 6pm tonight to feast on grilled chicken, steak, and lasagna. We had not been seated for longer than one minute when Iz said to me, "Mommy, when are you going to get a job?" Of course, everyone howled. Immediately, my friend, Ellen said, "Oh, I bet this going to be in your blog tomorrow!" Ah, Ellen, like Chris, knows me so well!

I think Iz's question didn't have anything to do with me not trying my hardest to find a job. I have applied for every job I'm qualified for, all of those I'm not, and even some questionable ones from craigslist. Err, those from craigslist were labeled "Writer" and not "Kept Woman," okay?!

Anyway, I believe that the economy has finally gotten to Iz.

When she asked if she could take horseback riding lessons, I said, "When Mommy gets a job, you can do that."

"Mommy, can I have a new DS game."
"No. Mommy doesn't have a job or a lot of money right now."

"Can we go to Disneyworld?"
"Perhaps when Mommy gets a job."

Something I've noticed lately, especially with the recession, is that we give our kids so much, maybe too much, these days, and, in turn, they expect it all. I'm not going to say that the problem is just that kids expect too much, because that would mean that they are to blame. And, they're not; we the parents are.

I had to think about it for a minute, because I don't want to sound like "And, when I was their age I had to walk 10 miles to school..." because I didn't have to walk 10 miles to school. I got a bus. BUT, I didn't go to the Galapagos Islands my sophomore year of high school during April vacation, I never got to go on any Spring Break vacation during college, I didn't get on a plane until I was 24, and I didn't go to Europe until I was 27! And, do you know what? I didn't turn out any worse for it. Had I had all those opportunities earlier would my life have been a bit more fun? Okay, maybe, but I didn't become a miserable failure in life because I missed any of those opportunities either.

The most important thing I learned growing up was that in order to get something I had to earn it; I wasn't entitled to it just because I happened to be standing there wanting whatever it was. When I was 14, I started babysitting; and, when I was 16, I got a job in a grocery store and eventually in a pharmacy. I had to earn all my spending money and book money for college each year. And, regardless of that, I was always expected to help out at home by doing something like the dishes, taking out the trash, doing laundry, or helping my Mom unload the car and put away the groceries. These weren't "If and when I felt like it" like it things to do; these were things I knew I had to do, because my parents both worked hard to clothe, feed, and school me.

I look at the way some kids treat their parents today, and I wonder if we're really creating generations who will do more because they have more, or are we just really creating generations who will do less because they feel that others should always be doing more for them?

And, I'd be the first to admit that I give my kids more than I should sometimes, though neither of them asks for too much, especially Nate; however, in times like these where we're all having to scrimp due to the recession, I'd be the first to say that when it comes to giving our kids too much, it's time to just say "No." <3